


Erin.

by misschevalier



Series: hearts. [2]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: F/M, Fem!Michael, I really wanted to write this but I wasn't sure which pairing but man myan is just perf, Miscarriage, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-14
Updated: 2014-09-14
Packaged: 2018-02-17 07:58:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2302349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misschevalier/pseuds/misschevalier
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Michelle knew she was broken.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Erin.

**Author's Note:**

> this fic was a first for everything: first fic I wrote in english and the first fic I wrote for the ragehappy. It started as a mavin fic but I wasn't sure and it ended as a Myan because, man, Ryan and Michael are two cuties. I'm not into mpreg (unless it's on the A/B/O verse), so I decided to make Michael a lovely lady named Michelle. 
> 
> comments are really appreciated. ♥

Michelle knew she was broken.

Not the usual broken where you say _oh, my heart’s broken, I need someone who can fix it, oh agony_. She was broken inside, where you say _'oh, my body’s a mess, I can’t fix it and it is a problem.’_

And yes, it was a problem.

It all started when Ryan and Michelle got married one Sunday morning in downtown Austin, it was fall and everyone was there: almost the whole office, their families and friends. Everyone was happy (drunk and happy) and it was perfect.

She used a simple white dress with lace on the shoulders, a short veil on her head, and Ryan couldn’t help himself but tear up when he saw her walking down the aisle. Although, he wasn’t the only, Michelle’s brother also wiped a few tears when he saw his little sister getting married.

(Michelle laughed at Ryan. "Please, don’t laugh," he said in response, gently taking her hands.)

In the end, it was perfect.

The problem started when they wanted to have a child.

The truth was that Ryan was the one who wanted a child. He was a family man and he wanted to have kids: an angry kid with Michelle’s adorable nose and maybe his personality, or even his nose and her bad vocabulary. He just wanted to have a child with her, but if Michelle wasn’t ready, he wouldn’t say a thing.

Michelle wasn’t sure if she was ready to have a kid. 

What really convinced her was when, one day, she walking into the office’s kitchen and saw Ryan with Caiti and Jack’s baby boy on his arms, looking at him with amazement, and Michelle’s heart jumped on her chest suddenly because that was the most adorable sight he had seen in her life.

That's when shit went down.

"Ryan, I want to have a kid.” Michelle announced, when Ryan pulled up in their driveway and after he parked the car.

"What?" He looked at her with his eyes wide open, and after a few minutes, a smile appeared on his face. “Really? Please tell me it’s not a joke.”

When she nodded, Ryan took her face in his hands, kissing her all over the face and even before Michelle could say anything against it, Ryan was getting out of the car and taking her with him into the house.

They tried that night.

And three weeks after that night.

And two Sundays later.

And that's when they fought (and Ryan slept in the spare room for two weeks.)

And then, Joel and married Rae (she looked beautiful in her dress and no one had seen Joel so happy in life when he finally saw his next-to-be-wife walking down the aisle.)

Then, they tried that night after they got home.

After much trying and failing and trying again, nothing happened and it looked as if was a mission impossible for Michelle to get pregnant. 

One day, Michelle went down with a virus and she stayed home for a few days. Ryan insisted in staying with her but she dismissed him (literally pushing him out of the door), and after that, and a lot of thinking, she took a cab to the nearest hospital.

When Ryan came back and left his keys on the entry table, he noticed that his wife was curled up in a nest of blankets in the living room watching yet not paying attention to the television. He knew something was wrong.

Sitting on the coffee table, between her and the TV, he took her hand, kissed it, and Michelle broke down (and it was the first time that Michelle had wept openly in front of Ryan.) He sat beside her, stroking her hair and saying, repeating, " _all is fine, love, everything‘s fine_."

"I can’t have children, Ryan," was all she said, and Ryan just kept holding her, kissing her temple.

They never wanted to bring up the topic again (but they had when Geoff asked them, because they had been acting strange.) They just didn’t want to talk about it, not even about adoption, nothing. 

And, as easy as that, they moved on, ignoring the subject, continued to play video games for living, laughing, Michelle getting angry with videogames and Ryan kept being the mad person in the office. 

In addition, they were working in what they loved, they were married to the person they most loved in the world and life wasn’t so bad. They were relatively happy- and if that means that Ryan didn’t get to see Michelle cry again, Ryan agreed with it, they were the _happiest_.

They didn’t try to have a child again, but they made love and that was something that was theirs and nobody could take it away. 

Ryan started noticing that Michelle has been getting up almost every morning to throw up and Ryan had been getting worried and worried about her. After Ryan’s insistence, Michelle decided to take a day off.

At four in the afternoon, when Ryan returned to the Achievement Hunter office after The Patch, he noticed that Michelle was sitting on his chair, wearing his jacket. “Hey, what’s wrong? Are you-?”

"I'm pregnant, Ryan."

That's when shit went down (once again.)

Ryan was thankful, and right now he didn’t care about where they were, he just wanted to hold his wife and kiss her until they had to search for air.

Everything looked better than ever.

The following nineteen weeks were the part of the best and the worst experience of their lives.

Michelle started having cravings, morning sickness, (Ryan got up at two o'clock to make pickles with strawberry jelly), she was happy, she was sad,  she complained that some clothes didn’t fit her any longer but for Ryan, she was the most gorgeous woman in the world.

In the fifth week, her belly began to show up and they couldn’t be more excited- not mentioning the people in the office. Gavin was already proclaiming himself the kid’s favorite uncle and Burnie was, when he could, over Michelle asking her if she was okay, if she needed to take time, only getting a _I_ _can still do my job, Burns, I’m fine_.

One afternoon in the office, when everyone was silently editing, Michelle started feeling back pain and tired, both to the point that she needed to lie on the couch. Geoff told Ryan (but it was more because of Jack’s insistence) to take her home to rest and not return until she felt better.

That Wednesday’s night, on the twentieth week, Michelle got up with a pain in her abdomen and a blood stained bed. They weren’t stupid, they knew what it meant, and it was a _nightmare_ coming true.

That Thursday’s morning, Burnie’s phone rang, which ended with Ashley answering, and then she heard Ryan ramblings: _blood, the baby, Michelle, I didn’t know who else to call_ , all in the same sentence.

She didn’t even hesitated to wake up Burnie beside her, get up and drive to the hospital, because she knew that Ryan needed someone to stop him from having a panic attack and Michelle needed someone there that wasn’t going to freak out at any moment.

The weeks passed and they tried to forget that the baby they wanted would never come, so the idea of having a child disappeared. 

The first few days, when they returned to _normality_ , Michelle didn’t want to work, she wanted to stay in bed all day (which could be totally understandable) but she returned to work as if nothing had happened in the last four months, and she entered the office with a big smile and gave the good morning to everyone, like nothing has happened.

Ryan was more than worried, she didn’t cry, didn’t comment anything and didn’t seem as if she had never been pregnant. Time passed, and neither of them didn’t touch the subject and continued walking through life.

The day Michelle finally broke down was the happiest day of someone else.

One morning Rae came into the office looking like crap, but she played her games, edited what she had to edit, recorded a HUNT with Geoff, and laughed at Adam and Joel fighting, everything seemed normal.

The next, she entered to the office looking happier than ever. When Geoff saw her in the morning, he felt the necessity to joke with a “does your period disappeared forever? I’ve never seen you so fucking happy as today, why the big smile?”

Ryan knew that Geoff shouldn’t have asked that, because the smile that Rae gave them was the same he had seen on Michelle’s face months ago when she told him that-

"I'm pregnant!"

Michelle didn’t react as people expected her to.

"Rae, I'm so happy for you!" She hugged and smiled at her. "That’s amazing!"

Ryan congratulated them: Rae at the office and when he saw Joel walking down one of the halls.

Most of the building was empty, the animators going home to recover from their crunch. Joel invited them out for lunch, Ryan was going to say yes but he had one problem: he couldn’t find his wife anywhere.

It turns out that Michelle was asleep on Miles’ couch.

The animators’ space was empty, except for Miles and Kerry, who were talking softly in the corner, keeping an eye on her.

They noticed Ryan looking at her. “She came a while ago, we talked and when we noticed, she was asleep _._ ” Ryan muttered an _okay_ and affectingly, awoke her wife.

(Usually Ryan didn’t like to show affection with Michelle in the office, but it was Miles and Kerry, and they were close friend, so he really didn’t care.)

She sat on the couch with Ryan next to her, letting her head rest on his shoulder. She smiled at them as if she was saying _thank you_ and then smiled at Ryan "Hey."

"Hello there, love," Ryan said, taking her hand. Miles took Kerry’s hand and pulled him away from their workspace.

"I'm so happy for her, Ryan," Michelle said, tangling their fingers together. "They will be so happy."

Before Ryan realized it, he was crying, and Michelle was crying too, hugging him tightly. She hid her face in Ryan's neck and wept, trying to keep quiet, without attracting attention to them. He couldn’t feel more relieved, because she finally was crying, leaving all his demons come out, and for the same reason, he wept with her.

Ryan continued saying _It’s okay_ and Michelle kept repeating _I'm so, so happy._

Neither of them believed what they said or what they heard.

 

And as if it was a dream, Ryan Haywood woke up.

He rolled on the bed, as if he was scared of something but there she was.

Sleeping next to him was Michelle, her short yet curly hair, her lovely freckles, she was there.  She was slowly waking up and when she noticed Ryan’s eyes on her, she giggled softly, hiding her face on the pillow. 

"You’re being a creep again,” she giggled. “Erin was doing the same the other day, when we had her here on the bed. She’s just like you-”

Erin Haywood Jones.

Erin was a small miracle that on the 16th of April, Michelle gave birth, almost one year ago.

The miracle that Michelle didn’t want to tell Ryan until a she was few weeks into her pregnancy, when she was sure about it. Ryan, in the other hand, was becoming crazy because… what if it was one of those psychological pregnancies? He was worried about Michelle, even when she said that everything was fine.

One day, after all the Achievement Hunters left the office, he sat her down, taking her hands and asked what was wrong.

"I'm pregnant."

This was possibly the only time were shit didn’t went down.

“For real?”

“What kind of question is that, Haywood?” She answered, laughing softly. “Yeah. I’m pregnant… again.”

“Do you want to have it?” He asked carefully.

She nodded, squeezing her husband’s hand.

“More than ever.”

 

Everyone was happy with the news even when the bad taste was still there but they tried to ignore it.

When Michelle told Rae, who was five months into her own pregnancy, she cried and said "Sorry, the hormones, you know,” she laughed, “I'm _so_ happy for you two."

The pregnancy was, if you subtract all sore feet, the back pains and all the Brixton Hicks contractions that Michelle got at work, everything was perfect. Gavin was more than excited when he saw Michelle’s ultrasound (“Oh, look at her! She’s so little, Mich!”)  and, both Geoff and Jack, had an eye on the woman whenever Ryan wasn’t around.

Shit actually went down when Michelle’s water broke down and her contractions started becoming stronger every minute that passed by.

They had everything prepared and Ryan drove to the hospital (with one hand on the wheel and the other interlaced with Michelle’s over his stomach) and when everything was a bit calmed down, he sent a some texts (people in the office made him promise to text them when Michelle was going to have that girl who they’ve waited so much.)

Burnie was ready to receive two types of messages: "Michelle is in hospital!" and "Michelle is in hospital." (It's amazing how an exclamation does change the sentence.)

What Ashley and Burnie didn’t expect was a message with a photo attached.

"THE FUCKING BABY IS COMING."

The photo was Michelle, wearing a hospital gown, showing the brightest smile on the whole world.

At 3:27 a.m., Ryan was holding Michelle's hand when she was having a c-section (because nobody said that this girl would be easy to bring to the world,) and he was waiting to hear, he _wanted_ to hear a cry from their little baby, but she didn’t and then nurses surrounded her.

When he turned to see Michelle, she had her eyes closed and her grip had loosened (and the sound of her heart began to slow and nurses pushed him out of the operating room.)

The next thing he remembers is someone, possibly Ashley or Burnie, pushing him to the nearest chair and hugging him (and realized he couldn’t tell his wife he loved her and couldn’t get to see his baby.)

At 4:40 am., a doctor came out to explain everything that had happened in the operating room but Ryan almost hit him and spat at his face _I just want to know if my daughter and my wife are fine. Okay?_

At 5:32 a.m., he was told he could go to see her girl in the newborn’s room. Ryan didn’t dare to move, he wanted to know if Michelle was fine.

(What if something happened to her and he wasn’t there to tell her how much he loves her, and what would happen if she died and he wasn’t there for her?)

Ashley and Jack went to see her for him and when Ryan received the photo of his baby wrapped in a pink blanket, mouth wide open and eyes shut tight as if she was crying loudly, he cried because she was precious.

At 6:05 a.m., Ryan entered Michelle’s room with their child in his arms, nurse walking behind him. Michelle slowly turned her head to see, she gave them a tired smile.

Carefully Ryan sat on the edge of the bed and gave Michelle the little girl, now resting on her arms. Both of them were looking at the baby, sleeping peacefully, her little hand clutching Michelle’s finger. 

“You had me fucking worried, young lady.”

Ryan laughed because, of course, the first thing Michelle would do is curse in front of her.

"She’s fine now, she was crying very loudly when I went to see her.”

"Good, that’s my baby." She rocked her softly, smiling. "Look at her, she’s gorgeous."

"Both of you are gorgeous, Michelle." He gently kissed her temple. "I love you."

"I love you too."

Ryan was silent, smiling at his wife before speaking again. "Erin."

"Erin?"

"Erin Haywood Jones."

"Sounds perfect. Hi Erin, hello love. Say hi to Dad," Michelle said, moving her finger up and down, Erin’s little hand moving with it.

"Hi Erin."

 

" _Dad_!"

Ryan snapped from his thinking when he heard his daughter's voice calling him.

"Dad, Dad! Look how pretty!”

He saw his daughter with a flower crown on her head, decorating her curls, and the biggest smile on her face. (She had her mother’s smile, along with the freckles that appeared not a few months ago, and Ryan found that really adorable.)

"It's beautiful, Erin," he smiled softly, and she ran back to her aunt Caiti. Jack and her were, beside Ashley and Burnie, really supportive with them and after everything, they got really close.

"Be careful, Erin!" Ryan heard Michelle’s voice. It was New Year’s eve and Geoff decided to celebrate it on his house, so they were hanging out in the backyard all together. Joel was discussing with Adam, making Gavin and Meg laugh loudly. Sitting next to them was Rae and on her arms, her boy sleeping as if all the noise from the party wasn’t bothering him.

Geoff was cooking and Griffon was sitting on the ground with Caiti, both of them playing around with the kids. Ryan noticed her wife walking towards him and then sitting on his lap, and he couldn’t do anything else but wrap his arms around his wife’s waist, enjoying the moment because Erin was lovely, Michelle was beautiful and life was fucking awesome.

"Ryan," Michelle murmured to him.

"Yes?"

"I want to have another child."

That's when shit went down

(In a good way, really. It was about time.)


End file.
